Interior decoration

image: feng shui and beyond

An interior decorator is someone who knows - who somehow just knows, deep in their bones - that the produce aisle in the grocery store needs a massive stack of canned pineapple in it. Even if you're not Mr Feng Shui himself, you can use the following insider insights to make your basement home as homey as any basement in China.
  • Clutter: Nothing says "lived in" like piles of clothes, junk mail, and those cute take-out boxes. A made bed breeds mites, but the expert experts agree that it's OK to make your bed once a week or so.
  • Books: Books bring a bookish quality to your home, and if read once in a while can also be a reliable early indicator of black mold.
  • Lamps: When lit from below, even a mausoleum becomes warm and inviting.
  • A fern: Having at least one other living thing in your basement can go a long way toward proving to doubters that your home is indeed inhabitable. If your ferns die too quickly, consider a Mother in Law's Tongue, which needs a minimum of sun, water, and love, but will definitely listen patiently if you feel like talking. 
  • Drum set: A basement without a drum set makes no sense whatsoever. In that time when everyone's cheering, just before the encore, drummers often leave them unattended.
  • Fine art: People who spend real money on works of fine art that were created by actual human-type beings are categorically considered culturally enlightened and generally afforded generous slack in every other aspect of their often peculiar lives. 
  • Guitars: Old guitars can be had for a song at garage sales and thrift stores, and every basement should have one or two, because the sound of music and laughter always brightens a room (even when the laughter is caused by the music). If you really can't play, spend a couple more bucks on a used electric guitar, a little amp, and a delay pedal - bam, you're The Edge.