What if my home scares me?

If your basement HQ is truly awful - it's an actual root cellar or maybe less like a groovy hacienda and more like a carpeted crawlspace - your best bet is to SALT-A-PIT: "Spend As Little Time As Possible In There." It's true that living in a basement is having a renaissance with the Reader's Digest crowd and other trend-setters, but I think you'll agree after some measured objective meditation that if you're starting to rack up medical bills related to your domestic situation, you're doing it wrong. 

Do not despair if this is indeed the case - a terrible home can be the spur that sets your life a' galloping. Just think of all the things you can do and all people you can meet when you're out in the world for 16-20 hours every day.

Here's a list to get you started: 
  • Get to know your all your neighbors: Ingratiate yourself to them with humble gifts - a bit of poetry framed in autumn leaves, for example. Then see if seven of them will have you over for a meal and a nap once a week.
  • Enjoy each moment: There's a lot to see in the big city if you've got money for the ticket - museums, theatricals, tennis matches...but don't forget that each clump of wet leaves is truly its own bit of poetry.   
  • Take notes: Let the world be your raw material, and you its sculptor. Create masterpieces for the Ages - a bit of poetry framed in autumn leaves, for example. Blog about it, make out like a bandit, and move into a better basement.

Having second thoughts about basement living? Consider this alternative.